Thanks to everyone who messaged me after my last blog post. Having these discussions doesn’t make us “bad” Christians. Instead, when we reveal our vulnerability to fellow Christians we strengthen the Body of Christ. I think many of us want to know God’s will; some struggle to do the thing He drops on our heart. That’s why today’s topic comes with another confession; a secret I’ve kept since March.
The Holy Spirit revealed several months ago what I should do, but I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind.
Remember in the Book of Exodus when God said to Moses, Go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people, the Israelites, out of Egypt.
Now Pharaoh was a dangerous ruler. Moses knew God was sending him somewhere he would most-likely be killed. Moses wasn’t raising his hand saying, “pick me!”
Make no mistake, I am by no means anything like Moses, and what the Holy spirit has been telling me has nothing to do with bringing people out of Egypt, but the dialogue between me and the Good Lord does mirror the conversation Moses had with God. I suspect the dialogue you have with Him is similar.
In March the Holy Spirit whispered to me, You need to start writing a weekly column for the newspaper.
Me, looking around because I’m sure the message was for someone else: Umm, I’m not a Botanist, I’m not a horticulturalist, I’m not a Naturalist. I don’t have a single “ist,” to add to the end of my name. I’m writing a novel remember?
I imagined the Holy Spirit giving me the look.
Next week, same whisper: You need to start writing a weekly column for the newspaper.
Me: I am under a self-imposed deadline. I have only a few chapters left in the novel. Besides, I can’t come up with weekly content.
This dialogue went on for a while. Now let’s look back at Moses.
But Moses said to God, Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?
And God said, I will be with you.
Spring came and went all while I worked the garden. This is the first garden I grew completely on my own. I’ve been right smart proud. The next time the Holy Spirit spoke with a warning, I’ll just give the newspaper stories to someone else. Someone else will be eager to do it.
Me (knowing what I wanted to do) said: Novel deadline . . . remember?
And with that I headed to the South Carolina conference with the intent of finishing The Novel. Remember how that worked? Lost keys. Creativity evaporated. Zero novel work. Eventually my thick noggin’ realized my prayer had been answered. While I may finish the novel in time, I will not finish it on my timeline.
In the book of Exodus, Moses and God continued their conversation.
Moses said to the Lord, Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.
The Lord said to him, Who gave human beings their mouths? Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.
Our modern-day dialogue with the Lord stems from a healthy fear of God, fear of making the wrong choice, but our questions might also be laced with stubbornness. After all, we want God to answer our prayer. We may pray, Lord, if it is your will, and mean the prayer sincerely, right until God points us in another direction. At that point we become Moses and say, “Lord, are you sure? Look at my inadequacies.”
My friends the Lord is sure about you. He knows us better than we know ourselves. We see our inadequacies; God sees our possibilities. So the question becomes, what is The Lord whispering to you? If He asks you to do something, do we then believe he will abandon us and laugh if we stumble?
We are afraid he won’t be proud of us, that we won’t be a good witness. Let us remember that God has more faith in us than we have in ourselves. Let us respond to the whisper with a resounding “Yes Lord!”